cobb just emailed this to me and it was so funny that i HAD to post it on here

if you've already got this from cobb then dont bother reading it again

but for those who hav'nt,

THINK YOU'RE HAVING A BAD DAY ? Check out these actual
     cases


     Fire authorities in California found a corpse in a
     burned-out section of forest while assessing the
     damage done by a forest fire.

     The deceased male was dressed in a full wet suit,
     complete with scuba tanks on his back, flippers, and
     face mask.

     A post-mortem test revealed that the man died not from
     burns, but from massive internal injuries. Dental
     records provided a positive identification.
     Investigators then set about to determine how a fully
     clothed diver ended up in the middle of a forest fire.

     It was revealed that on the day of the fire, the man
     went diving off the coast, some 20 miles from the
     forest. The fire fighters, seeking to control the fire
     as quickly as possible, had called in a fleet of
     helicopters with very large dip buckets.

     Water was dipped from the ocean and emptied at the
     site of the forest fire.

     You guessed it. One minute our diver was making like
     Flipper in the Pacific, the next, he was doing the
     breast stroke in a fire dip bucket 300 feet in the
     air.

     Some days it just doesn't pay to get out of bed.



     Still think you're having a bad day ?



     A man was working on his motorcycle on the patio, his
     wife nearby in the kitchen. While racing the engine,
     the motorcycle accidentally slipped into gear.

     The man, still holding onto the handlebars, was
     dragged along as it burst through the glass patio
     doors.

     His wife, hearing the crash, ran in the room to find
     her husband cut and bleeding, the motorcycle, and the
     shattered patio door. She called for an ambulance and,
     because the house sat on a fairly large hill, went
     down the several flights of stairs to meet the
     paramedics and escort them to her husband.

     While the attendants were loading her husband, the
     wife managed to right the motorcycle and push it
     outside. She also quickly blotted up the spilled
     gasoline with some paper towels and tossed them into
     the toilet.

     After being treated and released, the man returned
     home. He looked at the shattered patio door and the
     damage done to his motorcycle, and went into the
     bathroom to console himself with a cigarette while
     attending to his business.

     About to stand, he flipped the butt between his legs.

     The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard a loud
     explosion and her husband screaming. Finding him lying
     on the bathroom floor with his trousers blown
     away and burns on his buttocks, legs and groin, she
     once again phoned for an ambulance. The same paramedic
     crew was dispatched.

     As the paramedics carried the man down the stairs to
     the ambulance they asked the wife how he had come to
     burn himself. She told them.

     They started laughing so hard that one slipped and
     dropped the stretcher dumping the husband out. The
     poor man fell down the remaining stairs, breaking his
     arm.



     Still having a bad day? Just remember, it could be
     worse...



     The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the
     Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000.

     At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively
     saved animals were being released back into the wild,
     amid cheers and applause from onlookers.

     A minute later, in full view of everyone, a killer
     whale ate them both.


     STILL think you're having a bad day?



     Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the
     cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn,
     Germany.

     Suddenly, all two thousand pigs broke loose and
     escaped through a broken fence, stampeding madly.

     The two hopeless protesters were trampled to death.


     What?! STILL having a bad day??



     Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough
     postage on a letter bomb It came back with "return to
     sender" stamped on it.

     Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown
     to bits.


     There now, feeling better?